Zvakanaka here kuti mukadzi azviroore negwalangwa rake?

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From a cultural perspective munhu kadzi kuzvibvisira pfuma yeroora that's a non-starter because her own papa and mama will be very disappointed if they find out that's what happened—they also won't have enough respect for their mukwasha ("son-in-law") and will constantly look down on him even if he, later on, makes his own gwalangwa down the line

So it's probably better to avoid all that drama by skipping the whole traditional roora ceremony thing and maybe get married ku court—perhaps kutaura-taura kwacho kungaita kushoma.
From a cultural perspective munhu kadzi kuzvibvisira pfuma yeroora that's a non-starter because her own papa and mama will be very disappointed if they find out that's what happened—they also won't have enough respect for their mukwasha ("son-in-law") and will constantly look down on him even if he, later on, makes his own gwalangwa down the line

So it's probably better to avoid all that drama by skipping the whole traditional roora ceremony thing and maybe get married ku court—perhaps kutaura-taura kwacho kungaita kushoma.
 
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Shamiso

initiate
@Nehanda mumaonero angu kuzviroora it's a sign of desperation mostly driven by societal pressure and the dreadful fear of being single forever without a significant other.

However, if you are patient enough, don't have a bad reputation, and multiple baby daddies all over the place you can always find murume who can afford not only to take care of himself but kubatanidza mari yerusambo nedanga.

By the way, why would any woman want murume asina kana kobo zvaro? Ahyas, murume asina kurongeka se madomasi pamusika ngazvigare—he is a man-child and there is not much to say about him! ??‍♀️
 

Borrowdale Barron

grand master
@Nehanda mumaonero angu kuzviroora it's a sign of desperation mostly driven by societal pressure and the dreadful fear of being single forever without a significant other.

However, if you are patient enough, don't have a bad reputation, and multiple baby daddies all over the place you can always find murume who can afford not only to take care of himself but kubatanidza mari yerusambo nedanga.

By the way, why would any woman want murume asina kana kobo zvaro? Ahyas, murume asina kurongeka se madomasi pamusika ngazvigare—he is a man-child and there is not much to say about him!

@Shamiso so to you, a relationship is all about gauro first, and rudo always comes later?

Anyway, what about mukadzi asina shagi she is what?
 

Shamiso

initiate
@Borrowdale Barron I never said relationships are ALL about gwalangwa. But gauro is required for any relationship to function smoothly and make it more interesting.

There are no two ways about it otherwise rudo rwacho will be dull and boring.

I mean how will y'all go kuma dates, vacations, shopping, and all that fun stuff kana pasina chelede?

Moswera makango tuzurana zuva nezuva here amana?

And lest I forget, mukadzi asina chidadiso mukadzi. I suppose I have answered your other question too.
 

Bla Jedza

apprentice
@Nehanda vakadzi vazhinji are now making more gwalangwa than men compared to previous generations so it shouldn't be surprising there are numerous women vari busy kuzviroora these days.

They only choose to keep quiet about it nekuti zvinonyadzisa kutaura pane vanhu. ???
 

Lenard

Lenard Maseko
Rovora has always been about murume proving himself that he is capable enough to assume the role of a provider. But if mukadzi is the one who is doing all that then we are now talking about a new age tradition that's different from what was done since pasichigare.

With that said, I don't really think a majority of Zimbos want to change the old customary norms although there are some individuals who are certainly progressive and as a result, these same individuals are the ones who probably don't see anything wrong with mukadzi paying for her own lobola.
 

Scorpio

grand master
If the average roora in Zimbabwe to be paid was reasonable there wouldn't be a wide range of situations where women literary opt to traditionally marry themselves covertly behind their parent's back.

Some families are greedy at the expense of their own daughter's livelihood and that's the main problem. It's now way too many people who want to start businesses because of bridewealth.
 

Scorpio

grand master
@Lenard @Scorpio nowadays there are also some women who advocate for a 50/50 relationship so what's wrong kuti mukadzi abhadharewo bhiri rake rerusambo?

Is that not 50/50 yacho iyoyo?

Zvauri kutaura zvinonetsa nekuti vamwe vakadzi vakawanda (asi kwete vese zvavo) only bring up nyaya ye 50/50 mu relationship when it's convenient for them.

However, when ma settings erudo become inconvenient they will shift goalposts by redefining their expectations (id est, needs, and wants) in that relationship thereof.
 
T

Tanonoka

guest
@Borrowdale Barron supporting a woman financially is always a tricky situation and from the way I see it this can be broken into the following three categories:-

True Love​

If you love her to the extent that her happiness is the only thing that matters to you, then you won’t care to see how much financial support you are providing her. This would happen given the condition that you are financially well off and a few coins slipping away from your pocket doesn’t bother you.

Calculated Commitment​

This is the situation where you always keep a track of how much you are shelling on your woman. It might be the case that she often comes and asks you for support and after helping her you make another calculation on the totals that you have invested in her to date. This mostly would happen when you are uncertain about your woman and think your woman can change her mind later and all your investment may go down the drain.

Guaranteed Return​

This is the case where you support your woman knowing that she is capable enough to be financially independent sooner or later and will return you whatever she has taken from you.
So all in all whatever scenario you are in you always can support your woman financially if you are sure of the returns you are getting.


If you don’t see any return in short term and nothing even in the future you should get rid of her treating it as a dead investment.
 
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