Sonja Madzikanda felt sad in her marriage with Wicknell Chivayo. She left in her mind before they split up for real. The divorce papers remain unfinished because her ex-husband moves slowly on them.
"Wicknell caused me pain during our marriage. It was his actions and how he did those actions. I love the idea of marriage. I care deeply about close bonds. That describes me well. Yet you must ask what makes a true marriage. When it stops being a marriage, it stops being a marriage," Sonja said.
The process drags on because they need to finish certain matters. She starts to prepare herself mentally for leaving. His actions after they broke up shock her, but he acts the same way he did when they lived as husband and wife. This makes her glad she walked away since he has not changed.
She stands firmly behind her choice. By April, a full year will have passed since they parted ways. No drama happened after she left. She did not share long stories about their failed marriage online. She simply said she was going and kept quiet afterward.
She picked a calm life instead. "I would have gained weight, needed medicine for sadness, pills for worry, and many other things if I stayed," she explained. She wanted to stay strong for her children.
Many people say crying in fancy cars or planes beats crying with nothing. She disagrees with this idea. "Why must tears be part of love? Can we not just care for each other as friends? Can we not build futures together without pain? I refuse any setup where crying comes standard. Let us find happiness and treat each other nicely," she stated.
She cried hard yesterday because she felt annoyed. After almost a year, she expected they would have settled most things by this point. She believes her ex-husband has certain plans regarding their situation.
"Wicknell caused me pain during our marriage. It was his actions and how he did those actions. I love the idea of marriage. I care deeply about close bonds. That describes me well. Yet you must ask what makes a true marriage. When it stops being a marriage, it stops being a marriage," Sonja said.
The process drags on because they need to finish certain matters. She starts to prepare herself mentally for leaving. His actions after they broke up shock her, but he acts the same way he did when they lived as husband and wife. This makes her glad she walked away since he has not changed.
She stands firmly behind her choice. By April, a full year will have passed since they parted ways. No drama happened after she left. She did not share long stories about their failed marriage online. She simply said she was going and kept quiet afterward.
She picked a calm life instead. "I would have gained weight, needed medicine for sadness, pills for worry, and many other things if I stayed," she explained. She wanted to stay strong for her children.
Many people say crying in fancy cars or planes beats crying with nothing. She disagrees with this idea. "Why must tears be part of love? Can we not just care for each other as friends? Can we not build futures together without pain? I refuse any setup where crying comes standard. Let us find happiness and treat each other nicely," she stated.
She cried hard yesterday because she felt annoyed. After almost a year, she expected they would have settled most things by this point. She believes her ex-husband has certain plans regarding their situation.
